Frequently Asked Question

Getting Started with One Date
Last Updated 6 years ago

First off, let me congratulate you on picking up a copy of One Date! One Date and The Dating Artisan are together the most complete, comprehensive, yet also easiest (in my opinion) to use resources on dating on Planet Earth.

You're in excellent hands. We're going to get you doing exceptionally well socially and romantically.

A few notes before we get started:

  • Each video in this course is long (usually between 40 minutes and an hour). So grab a drink and a snack before you watch one, and settle in somewhere comfortable where people won't disturb you.

  • You don't have to remember everything we talk about in the videos. The One Date System and each module of The Dating Artisan comes with a handbook that covers the gist of all the material we discuss in the videos. You can skim this handbook any time you need a quick refresher, or just rewatch a video if you'd like a full review.

  • We tried to be as accurate, comprehensive, and flexible as possible, but that doesn't mean we covered everything. One of the biggest things I try to work against in students is dogmatic thinking. Try to avoid thinking "They said this in One Date, so this is always true" or "They didn't talk about that in One Date, so that must never work." In socializing, in general, just about anything can work. Some things are easier to make work than others, and we tried to give you every easy-to-make-work angle we could give you in this course. But no course is ever 100%, so don't be afraid to test new material out yourself. And definitely don't fall into dogmatic thinking. I'm not a dogmatist; I hope you won't be either.

Okay. So let's talk about how to use this system.


You may be tempted to jump around from lesson to lesson and avoid the earlier lessons on basics. Even if you're relatively experienced with women or very familiar with my own material at Girls Chase, I encourage you not to skip lessons if it's your first watch through the course.

A big part of learning is not just the absorption of knowledge, but the review and repetition of knowledge. We tried to make the course as non-repetitive (so we wouldn't bore you) as possible. Yet I want to make sure you don't skip over essential basics you don't realize you're missing or have forgotten to focus on because you think you've "got this already."

Humor me, if you must, and give the basics lessons a watch too. I think/hope you'll find something worthwhile in them, even if you're quite experienced.

Once you're watching One Date, you don't have to take notes. It's all (mostly) in the handbook. However, if you find taking notes improves your ability to retain and implement lessons, go ahead and take notes.

We have a variety of ways we teach in this course. The primary ones are:

  • Explanation/instruction. This is the meat and potatoes of the system, where I tell you what a thing is, the way it works, and then tell you how to use it or do it.

  • Insights. We'll share a finding from research, or an interesting observation, or a trend we've picked up over time in the field. Insights can be good for sparking a little epiphany in your mind, or giving you a way to look at something you hadn't previously considered.

  • Discussion. When we discuss something, you'll tend to get somewhat different perspectives from Hector, myself, Oana, and Andreea. In general, nobody's perspective is 'right' or 'wrong'; they are different ways of looking at the same issue (although I think we by and large agree on all the important things throughout One Date and TDA). You will hopefully find this useful to stay out of dogmatic thinking or black/white thinking. We all have our own lenses we see the world from, and different experiences that inform our views.

  • Demonstration. If we get onto a topic where I think demonstration is necessary, I'll either demonstrate on the set with Oana or Andreea, or we'll go to a more elaborate demonstration instead (like with approach invitations in Module 3; kind of hard to visualize what some of these look like, so we shot demonstrations). I would also, of course, suggest you pay attention to how both Hector and I interact with the girls throughout the videos too... this constitutes an ongoing demonstration in its own right.

Each of these different ways to teach/learn will appeal more or less to different styles of learners. If you learn best by mirroring and mimicking, for instance, you'll probably find the videos with Oana and Andreea in them the most useful, since you'll get to see Hector and me in action with them. If you learn best by instruction, then the parts of the course where I give you the how-tos will likely be the most useful to you.

I'd encourage you to try to use the full set of 'ways to learn' available at your disposal (those four different avenues above). The more of these you can make use of, the more fully and deeply you will learn the material, and the easier it will be for you to pick it all up.


At the end of each lesson in One Date, I give you a homework assignment.

You should do these assignments! They're fairly critical.

I know, I know. You're out of school now and you don't want to do homework. Or you're in school, and you've got enough homework from your classroom teachers and you don't want more homework from Chase Amante.

But really. Do the homework. It will make a big difference, I promise.

The homework is how you take the lessons of One Date out of the realm of 'theoretical' for you, and into the realm of 'lived experience'.

This is where you actually DO the stuff we talk about in the course. Where you put it into action, gauge how real people react to you in the real world, and start to get an intuitive sense for how this material works.

You should absolutely write down the results of your homework assignments. I encourage you to post them on the Alumni Forum (in the appropriate board) for public accountability and to build that sense of community around your efforts. When you are interacting with likeminded men on the same path you are, you're going to find it gets easier and more exciting to go out there and complete the homework assignments. You start to want to finish them just so you can show your peers on the forum you've done so.

If you don't want to use the forum, I'd encourage you to at least write down the results of your homework on a document or in a notebook. This is both for your own reference and your own personal accountability.

Though, if you can, forum trumps private document/notebook every time... due to that added oomph the public accountability and sense of community/identity will give you.

BEYOND THE HOMEWORK, you should try out anything from the course that interests you. And you should especially try out as soon as you can the three core aspects of the course: Similarity, Arousal, and Compliance.

Some things we cover you don't have to use if you don't want to. If you don't want to dress in red or you don't want to go for sex in a single date you don't have to do that. But you absolutely should use SAC, as well as all the other aspects of One Date we stress as important to use.

Not only are these vital, useful, extremely effective aspects of the course, but they're going to make your life a whole lot easier (and your courtships with women far more fun!) once you're using them.


Thanks for reading the 'Getting Started' guide.

I don't want to suck up too much of your time with a long tutorial on using the course. And I'd like to think we made the course pretty darn usable right out of the box.

So I'll get out of the way now and let you get on with using One Date.

Watch the introduction video, if you haven't already. Then get started going through the videos in the One Date System. I suggest you watch the videos before you read the book, since the book is more an overview and the videos go much deeper / you get a lot more context (and subtext) from them you don't get from book text.

I hope you have fun. I hope you enjoy using One Date. And I hope you find it useful, motivational, and above all effective.

Now let's get you some tremendous social success, and loads of dates with fun, pretty girls!


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